First question.

Where did all the time go? 

I still remember going to see ‘Three Sisters’ at the National Theatre London on the 31st of December and, thereafter, going to a church across the road for a watch night service. 

It was my first New Years without my mum and dad and going to the watch night service was the only family holiday tradition I could keep alive. 

It just feels like not enough time has passed for it to be November 1st already; time to pull out the journals and start planning for 2021. 

Second question. 

Do you feel small, like you are incapable of making a difference in the world? 

The world seems to have toppled on it head this year and seeing a silver lining has been be really difficult. 

Here are the areas I feel small and insignificant and the things I am attempting to do about those things:

Family

I haven’t gone this long without seeing the members of my family and I have this hum of ‘missing’ that won’t leave me alone. If not for the pandemic we would have visited so I have compensated with constant communication and sometimes just leaving a video call running in the background while we go about our day. 

I have come to terms with the humming. I will always miss my family once I am away from them and this is okay. 

Politics

I never paid attention to politics and never cared much about voting. I am ashamed to admit it but all things political just overwhelmed me, so I stayed away. 

In the last few months I have turned a corner and I want to understand everything: how politics works and what goes into governance, but the more I research I can’t help feeling little – feeling that I don’t have the power to change anything. I understand it but how do we go about effecting change in a system with a design flaw? Figuring out how to start has been overwhelming. 

I haven’t figured it out completely, but here is what I am doing: tweeting about the things I am learning and sometimes lashing out at government bodies and agencies. Having an outlet is helping as well as researching into different initiatives from across the world to gain an understanding of how others are going about it. 

Last question. 

How do you spice up your meal prep? 

In the past year, since I started living alone, I have realised that meal prepping is one thing that ensures you don’t go hungry but it has the potential to quickly get boring. I am stumped on this, I don’t have an answer or an approach. Okay, maybe I am not completely stumped. I am trying two new recipes this week as options to add to my roster, but suggestions on how to spice things up are welcomed. 

These are all the things that keep me up at night and then some. 

Here is to a glorious November! 

Happy New Month.